Tag Archives: clowns

Book Exerpt, Clowns

Jonny Bot 5

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Jonny Bot 5 got horny and hot                                                                                 for a high fashion mannequin girl (who did NOT!).                              Classy and fine, Jonny loved her a lot,                                                              she turned up her nose…a high minded snot.                                                  He brought wild flow’rs by the bunch, by the pot,                                   tried candy, tried gems, read poems – what ROT!                                      But kindness in turn Jonny 5 never got,                                                           not an ounce, not a peck, not even a jot.                                                       Tried…..and tried ’till his brains were quite shot                                        until finally…Jonny went cold……and forgot.

***This image and poem is from our book, “Bludgeon the Clown” (buy it by following the links, above, to my site www.sallemander.com).  When we met Jonny Bot 5 he was already retired from the department store and well beyond his bad marriage with the mannequin…but was now engaged in a sordid online sex thing with Siri the phone chick…it was…well, lets just say ‘I wish I could un-see some things.’  I think John got some good sketches of them during the interview but our publisher (EEW Books) censored all but this one.   -Marsha

Clowns, Freaks

MASK!!!

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***Our apologies to all our clown friends for this PSA. We should never associate clowns with any kind of politics in America, or equate them with stupid, greedy, selfish, childish and dull people of any kind. It’s not just that we offend one of the most moral, decent and whimsical species on the planet, it’s that if you do it too often, they will find you, kill you, then fuck you and eat you…bones and all! (We’re hoping this disclaimer cleans the slate for us.) -Marsha

Book Exerpt, Clowns, Freaks, Political

U.S.A.

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Democrat?  Republican?  Who can fuckin’ tell?                                          Red state, Blue state?  Die and go to Hell!                                                    Argue ’bout it all you want, knock each other out.                                 ‘Right-Left’ bullshit ain’t what its about.

***This is such an easy re-post! This image is an excellent metaphor for a criminally inactive American government in the fatal, final decline of late-stage capitalism (yes, both parties and all three branches). A police state, during a global pandemic and environmental disaster, a corporate oligarchy with unchecked greed, graft and stupidity rotting away the core of the richest empire on Earth, with the most gigantic army…history shows us the fate of nations that become so weak.

This image was first published in 2015, in our first book, “Marsha Mellow’s Blue-ish Freaks.” You can find our first four books (and BUY them) by following the links to our Etsy shop, or go to etsy.com and search EEWbooks. -Marsha

Book Exerpt, Clowns

Godiva

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GODIVA  (book excerpt, page 64)

Saggy Bottom, West Virginia.  The most important thing about this image of Godiva the Clown is that she is not just your average tattooed chick on a raging purple horse…..what you see is all Godiva, horse and all.  I was already impressed with her before I realized… well, just how dynamic her lady parts were.  But WOW!!!

Back in the day, between the oil wars and the water wars – before crazy fascists started hunting clowns and anarchists and Indians (again) for their skins – it was hard to go half a block without running across another painted, naked wench on a hybrid psychedelic farm animal.  It was high fashion for a while.  It was even worse out west with winged warthogs and angry caterpillar chicks trophy hunting for penis.  Aaaahh…..can’t wait ’till those were the good old days.

***The image above is the original red rough sketch for the illustration on page 65 of “Bludgeon the Clown.”  I have never posted the final image.  If you want to see it, you’ll have to buy the book.  I reserve the BEST art for paying customers.  Find it and buy it at www.sallemander.com or search EEWbooks at etsy.com.   -Marsha  

Clowns

Bludgeon the Clown

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 BLUDGEON THE CLOWN

***These are the original rough sketches for the cover of our 3rd book, “Bludgeon the Clown,” a fully illustrated graphic field guide exposing the grizzly details of our current worldwide clown conspiracy. The material in this book could irrevocably alter life as we know it (for the better), unless we’re really careful.  Written by Marsha Mellow (with over 100 illustrations by John Allemand), it is 100 pages of candy-coated, yummy, clown-infected goodness (with nuts).  Find it and buy it at www.sallemander.com or search EEWbooks at etsy.com.   -Marsha

 

 

Book Exerpt, Clowns, Political

Uncle Sammy the Clown

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Sammy the Clown thought he could fly                                                              so he threw himself  off the roof                                                                           and flapped his arms for eighty-nine floors                                                 ‘fore he realized his tragic goof.

***Okay, this one’s political.  Yeah, it’s a keen example of the ‘rough sketch to final art process’ thing, but I posted it to show how thoroughly fucked America is as coronavirus spreads.  Even if Uncle Sammy here is only an inch or two off the ground, that fall is gonna hurt.  People here, by the millions, regardless of their politics or intelligence, are running out of money and food…and they WILL break quarantine.  The U.S. government is NOT helping!!!  This is a page from our 1st book, ‘Marsha Mellow’s Blue-ish Freaks’.  You can find all our books at;  www.sallemander.com   -Marsha

Clowns, Political

Loose Head Fred

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This is an image from our 3rd book, “Bludgeon the Clown,” There’s no silly story blurb or rhymed ditty to go with it.  Not every idea has, or needs, words.  It’s just a swell example of how John’s sketch and design process looks.  Most images take several scribbly thumbnails to come to a viable rough.  This one took one…THIS one.  John got lucky.  Whatever you do, please don’t  – in this tragic time of plague – please don’t mistake it as a political statement.  It is not intended to show what sometimes happens to a government when they bail out the rich, ruling class  and abandon the common and poor in a time of crisis…..it’s just a funny clown illustration.  Find and buy all of our extraordinary books at www.sallemander.com.   -Marsha