{"id":915,"date":"2017-11-14T09:00:31","date_gmt":"2017-11-14T14:00:31","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/?p=915"},"modified":"2017-11-14T09:00:31","modified_gmt":"2017-11-14T14:00:31","slug":"whats-the-sense-of-it-all-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/?p=915","title":{"rendered":"What’s The Sense of it All?"},"content":{"rendered":"

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Larry had no objection to toes.\u00a0 He never thought much about them, really.\u00a0 Sure, they help us to stand up straight and balance on two feet\u2026but so what!?\u00a0 They\u2019re just little nubbly things. \u00a0They\u2019re not sexy or cool like fingers (at least you can pick your nose and scratch your ass with fingers). \u00a0Toes are shit.\u00a0 They make lousy ear rings, smell worse than ass crack and are too bony to eat (even saut\u00e9ed in olive oil with mushrooms and onions) and they taste like chum, anyway.<\/p>\n

So why?\u2026..What\u2019s the sense of growing one right out from the center of his forehead?\u00a0 How could he have gone to bed last night, feeling like a perfectly normal modern man (with hypertension, diabetes and chronic back pain) \u2026and wake up the next morning with such bad luck?\u00a0 What kind of rotten cosmic karma did he upset for nature or god (or whatever) to decide to put a big gnarly, fully grown toe, right smack between his eyes?<\/p>\n

Seriously though, wasn\u2019t it bad enough that he already had a whole festering patch of them growing down his back?\u2026..UGHHH!!!\u00a0 What\u2019s the sense of it all!!?<\/p>\n

***I\u2019m pretty sure Larry isn\u2019t the only one who wakes up every morning with awkward growths or nasty lumps.\u00a0 Some are easy to dispatch, others we just have to live with.\u00a0 But\u2026all is not lost, the solution to all your woes can be found in the pages of\u00a0our new book,\u00a0“Bludgeon the Clown.”\u00a0 You can find it by following the link above to www.sallemander.com.\u00a0\u00a0(This piece is reposted from June of last year.) \u00a0 -Marsha<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Larry had no objection to toes.\u00a0 He never thought much about them, really.\u00a0 Sure, they help us to stand up straight and balance on two feet\u2026but so what!?\u00a0 They\u2019re just little nubbly things. \u00a0They\u2019re not sexy or cool like fingers (at least you can pick your nose and scratch your ass with fingers). \u00a0Toes are … Continue reading What’s The Sense of it All?<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[118,150,241],"tags":[28,210,105,128,38,176,99,19,96,102],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/915"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/6"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=915"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/915\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":927,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/915\/revisions\/927"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=915"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=915"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=915"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}