{"id":911,"date":"2017-11-07T09:11:20","date_gmt":"2017-11-07T14:11:20","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/?p=911"},"modified":"2017-11-07T09:11:20","modified_gmt":"2017-11-07T14:11:20","slug":"loser-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/?p=911","title":{"rendered":"Loser!"},"content":{"rendered":"

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I won!\u00a0 I am the richest man on Earth.\u00a0 I have more money than God!\u00a0 I\u2019m not just the richest, though\u2026I\u2019m the winner!\u00a0 I am the inevitable culmination of centuries of unregulated capitalism.\u00a0 I own everything;\u00a0 All the money, all the gold, all the oil, the water, infrastructure, stocks, bonds, real estate \u2013 EVERYTHING!<\/p>\n

The entire population of Earth, all 7 million, are my employees and tenants.\u00a0 Wait\u2026did I say 7 million?\u00a0 No, there\u2019s only 5.8 million as of this week\u2026heck, I remember when there were 7 billion\u2026but never mind that, they\u2019re just little people.\u00a0 Losers!\u00a0 I won and they lost.<\/p>\n

Too bad for them.\u00a0 Is it my fault they were born poor and unlucky, that they made bad life decisions, were unable to afford the finest education money could buy and had no inherited wealth with which to game the system?\u00a0 If God didn\u2019t favor me he would not have made me so rich.\u00a0 That\u2019s what makes me so much better than you.<\/p>\n

The only question now is\u2026What to do with it all?\u00a0 My only goal was to win\u2026now what?\u00a0 I own ten thousand fishing yachts but the oceans are dead.\u00a0 I used to like the beach but they\u2019re polluted now and storms have destroyed all the coastal cities.\u00a0 I used to hunt but there\u2019s no wildlife, no more forests, either.\u00a0 Everything is desert and all the clouds are gone and I burn so easily\u2026<\/p>\n

But never mind all that\u2026..I\u2019m the winner!\u00a0 It must have been worth it, because I WON!!!\u00a0 I\u2019m richer than you.\u00a0 I\u2019m better than you and I won! \u00a0So piss off!!\u2026..and bring me a fresh canister of air! (gasp)\u00a0 I\u2019m friggin\u2019 suffocating over here\u2026LOSER!!!<\/p>\n

***It’s election day in NJ and this\u00a0seemed like\u00a0the perfect one to repost.\u00a0 Besides, the image, ‘Corporatism,’\u00a0has just been published in my new book “Bludgeon the Clown” (which you can buy if you follow the links to www.sallemander.com).\u00a0 Good luck picking the ‘lesser-of-two-evils’ again, I mean,\u00a0it’s worked out perfectly so far…..\u00a0 -Marsha<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I won!\u00a0 I am the richest man on Earth.\u00a0 I have more money than God!\u00a0 I\u2019m not just the richest, though\u2026I\u2019m the winner!\u00a0 I am the inevitable culmination of centuries of unregulated capitalism.\u00a0 I own everything;\u00a0 All the money, all the gold, all the oil, the water, infrastructure, stocks, bonds, real estate \u2013 EVERYTHING! The … Continue reading Loser!<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[242,125,150,239],"tags":[210,105,128,176,99,173,96,102],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/911"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/6"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=911"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/911\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":914,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/911\/revisions\/914"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=911"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=911"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=911"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}