{"id":854,"date":"2017-08-29T09:00:52","date_gmt":"2017-08-29T13:00:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/?p=854"},"modified":"2017-08-29T09:00:52","modified_gmt":"2017-08-29T13:00:52","slug":"making-an-entrance","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/?p=854","title":{"rendered":"Making An Entrance"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"\u00a0<\/a>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 They called it ‘Body Piercing.’\u00a0 It was very rare, very risky…for both the acrobat and the victim.\u00a0 Frisbee the Bouncer contemplated the origins of the maneuver he had just failed to properly execute. \u00a0Willy the Clown (the victim) was finally settling down a bit, allowing Frisbee some time to think: you see, audiences had gotten bored with traditional tumbling and acrobatics, even parkour had lost it’s charm…free-runners traversing buildings, flipping and spinning across rooftops and bridge rafters, bouncing\u00a0about from car to car in midtown traffic…I mean, it’s not as if everybody could do it nowadays, but people got bored seeing it all the time.<\/p>\n

New ideas evolved to shock and awe the masses, each more extreme, risky…deadly.\u00a0 The ‘Tongue In Cheek’ was already banned in 17 states, the ‘Cockeyed Cock’ was responsible for 3 temporary deaths, 12 online divorces and 41 spontaneous abortions (in Tennessee alone)…then came ‘Body Piercing.’\u00a0 It was like a grizzly car crash on the turnpike that you can’t help staring at.\u00a0 Frisbee recalled that the most difficult part was the need to make an entrance (not what you’re thinking).\u00a0 How does an acrobat bounce right through the center of an unsuspecting victim’s body (without using an existing entrance – or exit)?\u00a0 Well, Frisbee was quite certain he had it all figured out…but…..well, look at the picture!<\/p>\n

Willy the Clown went quickly from surprise to horror, screaming bloody murder for 30 minutes straight…now he was just pissed off at Frisbee, who simply\u00a0mumbled, “That should have worked!…Why didn’t that work?” over and over and over.<\/p>\n

Somebody call an ambulance…!?!<\/p>\n

***I wrote this piece last week, sitting out in my new back yard, atop the loveliest snowdrift in the midnight sun, watching flying reindeer dogfighting overhead.\u00a0 I’m so happy in my new house at\u00a0the\u00a0North Pole.\u00a0 The image is one from my “Creepy Clowns Coloring Book,” which you can find for sale by following the links\u00a0to my website.\u00a0 -Marsha\u00a0\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 They called it ‘Body Piercing.’\u00a0 It was very rare, very risky…for both the acrobat and the victim.\u00a0 Frisbee the Bouncer contemplated the origins of the maneuver he had just failed to properly execute. \u00a0Willy the Clown (the victim) was finally settling down a bit, allowing Frisbee some time to think: you see, audiences had … Continue reading Making An Entrance<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[118,125,150],"tags":[210,105,128,176,99,96,102],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/854"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/6"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=854"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/854\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":857,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/854\/revisions\/857"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=854"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=854"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=854"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}