{"id":379,"date":"2016-03-08T09:01:39","date_gmt":"2016-03-08T14:01:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/?p=379"},"modified":"2016-03-08T09:01:39","modified_gmt":"2016-03-08T14:01:39","slug":"loser","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/?p=379","title":{"rendered":"Loser!!!"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Corporatism-23\"<\/a><\/p>\n

I won!\u00a0 I am the richest man on Earth.\u00a0 I have more money than God!\u00a0 I’m not just the richest, though…I’m the winner!\u00a0 I am the inevitable culmination of centuries of unregulated capitalism.\u00a0 I own everything;\u00a0 All the money, all the gold, all the oil, the water, infrastructure, stocks, bonds, real estate – EVERYTHING!<\/p>\n

The entire population of Earth, all 7 million, are my employees and tenants.\u00a0 Wait…did I say 7 million?\u00a0 No, there’s only 5.8 million as of this week…heck, I remember when there were 7 billion…but never mind that, they’re just little people.\u00a0 Losers!\u00a0 I won and they lost.<\/p>\n

Too bad for them.\u00a0 Is it my fault they were born poor and unlucky, that they made bad life decisions, were unable to afford the finest education money could buy and had no inherited wealth with which to game the system?\u00a0 If God didn’t favor me he would not have made me so rich.\u00a0 That’s what makes me so much better than you.<\/p>\n

The only question now is…What to do with it all?\u00a0 My only goal was to win…now what?\u00a0 I own ten thousand fishing yachts but the oceans are dead.\u00a0 I used to like the beach but they’re polluted now and storms have destroyed all the coastal cities.\u00a0 I used to hunt but there’s no wildlife, no more forests, either.\u00a0 Everything is desert and all the clouds are gone and I burn so easily…<\/p>\n

But never mind all that…..I’m the winner!\u00a0 It must have been worth it, because I WON!!!\u00a0 I’m richer than you.\u00a0 I’m better than you and I won! \u00a0So piss off!!…..and bring me a fresh canister of air! (gasp)\u00a0 I’m friggin’ suffocating over here…LOSER!!!<\/p>\n

***This is NOT about Trump!\u00a0 It has nothing to do with our freak show elections and we don’t take sides, anyway (although, the corporate dude riding Uncle Sam like a bitch\u00a0DOES look more like Hillary than Trump). \u00a0This isn’t even a political website!\u00a0 It was simply the scheduled date for this story and image.\u00a0 Is it our fault that all the candidates piled into a mini-Clown Car and crashed it straight into the gaping ass of an elephant?\u00a0 -Marsha<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I won!\u00a0 I am the richest man on Earth.\u00a0 I have more money than God!\u00a0 I’m not just the richest, though…I’m the winner!\u00a0 I am the inevitable culmination of centuries of unregulated capitalism.\u00a0 I own everything;\u00a0 All the money, all the gold, all the oil, the water, infrastructure, stocks, bonds, real estate – EVERYTHING! The … Continue reading Loser!!!<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[125],"tags":[128,170,167,173,164],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/379"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/6"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=379"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/379\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":386,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/379\/revisions\/386"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=379"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=379"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sallemander.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=379"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}